A year ago today started as an ordinary day. Settling into our new home, arranging pictures, organising cupboards all was as it should be. Then came the phone call and the knock at the door telling us the worse news of all. My darling beautiful daughter had lost her Dad.
Unexpected death reverberates across everything. It challenges all we know and all we thought we knew. Old passions and scores are no longer important and the here and now becomes the only thing that matters. Within a split second we recognise how fragile life is. It is as if the moment is suspended while our brains and hearts begin to understand what has happened, and what it really means.
What happens next? Life goes on. In the 364 days since this happened the world didn’t stop. It changed. Sadly this was to be the first of several deaths of people we love in the year that followed. Life still went on. We attended funerals, listened to words describing those we have cared for, hugging family and staying strong together. That was the year that was.
Life went on. A new baby brought hope and sunshine into our family. We went on holiday and we came home. I started and finished a new job . Life went on.
Today my daughter is getting on with her life She has made some great choices in the past year. Finishing college, passing her course, setting off to a new country for new adventures. Back home and picking up work again and she is resuming friendships, thinking thoughts and making plans. There are not enough words in the world to describe the pride I feel for her.
If there is something I have remembered in this past year, it is something I learned many years ago, when I lost my parents. That is to embrace the Now, for it is truly all we have.
If you love someone, tell them.
If you want to do something, do it, now, today, immediately.
Don’t waste time with things that do not matter.
Don’t spend a minute of your life doing things you hate, even if the rewards seem good, your time is worth more
Be brave, make a change if change is what you need.
Embrace positive people and ignore those that would do you down.
Most of all remember that life does go on. Things may never be the same again, but we will get used to the way it is now. Memories last long. Laughter and love linger. Life goes on.